Crying in the Night

I know that you can’t sleep. Your troubles are many and your  heart is full. You’ve carried so much that’s bottled up inside. I know how you hurt and the way you feel. Being a prisoner of your own mind is a hell one can’t imagine. I know you cry yourself to sleep at night. I do it too. All alone and hundreds of miles away. We are all alone but together in our plight,

images (9)

It has been said that the eyes are the window to the soul. Does that mean the tears that escape our eyes are those of our soul? When we cry ourselves to sleep are we cleansing our souls? It’s draining and heart wrenching to cry yourself to sleep. Nobody can hear your cries. Nobody knows what happens when you turn off the light. Staying awake to the wee hours of the night sometimes keeps the cleansing from happening. Sometimes I don’t sleep because I am afraid to. I feel safer sleeping during the day.

1203989710_f

The things that go bump in the night are far more sinister than you think. Those are the things that live in our head. They crowd our minds and overwhelm us to tears, They bring us fear and the feeling of emptiness. The night is the loneliest time so our minds won’t let us sleep. We must flight with our demons and bare our soul. Then and only then will we find our peace and drift to sleep.

large

I’ve lost touch. I think all human beings need to be touched. So many times I just want to be held. I want to feel safe. I cry myself the sleep in hopes that somebody will appear and take me into their arms and tell me it’s ok. This fantasy drives me. I am alone all the time. I want what I can’t have. I want something impossible. I stumble around blindly hoping someone will reach out and take my hand. I need to feel human interaction. I am starved for it.

download (10)

I’m tired of reaching in the dark for something I can not see. I hoping to crash into someone or something before I loose it. Some of us are meant to wander. We are the restless. The weary gravitate to each other sometimes. It’s wonderful to feel at peace with a fellow traveller. As you sleep close to one another in your warm bed, we are alone in the dark. We are crying in the night.

Advertisements

7 thoughts on “Crying in the Night

  1. I was hanging on your every word Bonnie! Too many nights I’ve felt like this. Lonely in a crowded house, and sometimes it was self imposed. You write about your pain so eloquently there’s such a beautiful truth in your words. ❤️

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I literally do not see.
    🙂
    However, I love to use the metaphor of stumbling blindly in the dark. I’m awake many nights as well. Part of it is loneliness, but sometimes I feel more peace when it is night.
    Other times I simply can not shut my brain off long enough for sleep to take hold.
    Great post.

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s